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I’m sharing all of this because I know that a number of you relate.

In May 2014, I blogged about Amazon’s impact on the Seattle dating scene, put simply: “not enough ladies too many mans”.

The post quickly went viral and spawned a number of follow-ups – the most popular of which, “Amazon is Killing My Sex Life” by Tricia Romano, made it into the late New York Times’ columnist David Carr’s curriculum for his communications class.

Then, in November 2014, I wrote “‘Amageddon’: Seattle’s Increasingly Obvious Future”, which hit a nerve and received well over a hundred thousand page views.

In the wake of these posts, I’ve heard from a lot of people about their love-hate relationship with Seattle and its changing face.

I also hear it frequently on my dates – of which there have been many. If there’s one thing I can do as a writer, it’s initiate conversations about what’s happening where we live and in our society.

As ill-advised as it may seem, I want to share my experience with dating, friendship and the Seattle Freeze after forty.

Seattle historian and columnist Knute Berger says that “despite our smiles, we can be a passive-aggressive, cold-shouldered kind of place.” He calls it “Seattle Nice”: If you’re the kind of person who invites neighbors you’ve never met to a get-to-know you barbecue, well, it might help you to know we have a name for people who do things like that: They’re called ‘stalkers.’I’ve had the same neighbors for 15 years and while we’ve house-sat for each other’s cats and come over to wish them farewell on the eve of their euthanasia, we’ve never actually had dinner together. For a long time, I was a skeptic but the growth of the city and its male-dominated tech scene has brought a unique new chill.

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